Wednesday, August 29, 2012

He is Always Good. Life is Tough Sometimes.

Long post warning... I am currently sitting in my room as a dog barks below from my neighbors one room small hut. It doesn't make any sense to me.... I get the joy of writing and sharing my journey with all of you and others who are kind enough to care and read, while my neighbors sleep on a dirt floor. I didn't choose to be born into the home I was born into. We dont get to choose where we are born or who we are born too.  Certainly circumstances in life may get worse but sometimes it just seems not fair that I was born with a roof always over my head, two parents that love me well... that is not the case here. Life is just that I suppose, not fair, out of our control, and so good and beautiful at the same time. I write this as I learned of some very unfortunate news of a dear friend today. I want to ask for your prayers of my dear friend Amy Patwa.  If praying is not your thing I ask that you keep her, her husband and her sweet 2 year old in your mind. 

I had the joy of knowing Amy when I was a Freshman in school and we worked at a Younglife camp in Florida for a summer. Amy is strong, Amy is not giving up, but cancer is eating her body, but not killing her spirit. Amy wrote these words below in her caring bridge journal as a reflection on her most recent news with her now lung cancer battle (she was found to have a tumor in her lung only 2 months after finishing 8 months of chemo and radiation for breast cancer, her lung is now surrounding by a large tumor). She writes:

"Through tears our doctor told us she is scared for me.  That now is the time to shoot videos for my daughter and write her birthday letters.  This made the 4 hour wait worth it.  She was severely honest with us, and incredibly kind as she cried with and for us. 

We are weary, overwhelmed, sad, scared.  I have to say that the peace I had 4-6 months ago has waned.  And what I've felt lately is fear.  I feel like I knew this was coming.  As if the Lord was preparing me.  This is very surreal for the both of us.  How do you take the news that "this is killing you" and "we are going to fight it with all we've got" and marry those two competing thoughts?   I'm not giving up.  I'll try anything once.  Ultimately I want to live in peace.  I want sweet time with my beloved and sweet little lady.  I want treasured time with family and friends.  I want to live each day clinging to Jesus.  And I will still pray for a miracle. "

Visit her caring bridge,

I write this with tears streaming my face because it is all a bit overwhelming at the moment, the reality of it all, that the world is so broken, so much is needed and so many are hurting and there is so much to do, and I am so not capable of making even a dent in the mix. I certainly do not know the solution to the worlds problems, nor would I be one to make judgement as to what should be done, or what you are or what you are not doing. Perhaps my prayer is that we can cling tightly to those around us, love others well because this life is short, hard and weary but if we act as though others don't matter things are surely only going to get worse. My favorite book I read recently is called Kisses from Katie and she writes the quote below and writes this much better than I could:

"Sometimes working in a Third World country makes me feel like I am emptying the ocean with an eyedropper. And just when I have about half a cup full of water it rains: More orphaned children from the north migrate to where I live, more orphaned and dead babies are found, more people are infected with HIV. It is enough to discourage even the most enthusiastic and passionate person. And yet the discouragement lasts only a moment and God tells me to keep going. That He loves me. That He loves these people. That He will never leave or forsake any of us, not one. That my work is important-to Him." Kisses from Katie (book)

Every child and every face you just want to sweep up in your arms and clean them up, give them a bath and give them lotion to make them feel better. Rooms with dirt floors, homes without a roof, no shoes on children...but the quote above puts it best, there is so much need, and so many people, so many starving.

Yesterday we spent the remainder of our day trying to go to the bank to find out we needed our passports, buying shelves for my room to then forget that the man gave me my 10 limpiras back and I then accused him of charging me more, where then it was as though he grabbed the store manager....and I saw that the money I put in my purse. SO EMBARRASSING. I then repeatedly said “Lo Siento, Lo Siento” I am sorry, I am sorry. 

Today was spent at the school, looking at our books and trying to figure out where we are to begin planning lessons with only two more days until school starts. Not all of our textbooks have teacher editions.. so we are still working through how we are to teach. The rest of our evening was spent beginning to make classroom decorations. I have opted for a sports theme room in one and a traveling/traffic theme in the other. You may be asking why two classrooms? We are one teacher short which means I am teaching both classes of 2nd grade, 50 or so children. Math, Science, Reading, Phonics, Grammar, Writing. I have no idea how I will do this or be ready by Monday but ready or not they are coming on Monday! Other teachers will step in to help while I am with the other classroom and then Classroom A is in Spanish or PE for example. I will write my schedule later so you can get a better idea.

As well we got a huge water tank installed on our porch. All i took was 4 men, climbing a tree, using rope to wrap around the post in our apartment through the door to leverage the massive thing up to our porch. Quite a sight to see to say the least.

I am exhausted today.. more funny stories and information about the school and pictures to follow.

Muchas Bendiciones para tiMany blessings to you

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